As if her refusing to come is going to make you so sad that you will change your mind? ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{background-color:#fff;box-shadow:0 0 0 1px rgba(0,0,0,.1),0 2px 3px 0 rgba(0,0,0,.2);transition:left .15s linear;border-radius:57%;width:57%}._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS:after{content:"";padding-top:100%;display:block}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-pack:start;justify-content:flex-start;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-navIconFaded10);border:2px solid transparent;border-radius:100px;cursor:pointer;position:relative;width:35px;transition:border-color .15s linear,background-color .15s linear}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3kUvbpMbR21zJBboDdBH7D{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-navIconFaded10)}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3kUvbpMbR21zJBboDdBH7D._1L5kUnhRYhUJ4TkMbOTKkI{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-active)}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3kUvbpMbR21zJBboDdBH7D._1L5kUnhRYhUJ4TkMbOTKkI._3clF3xRMqSWmoBQpXv8U5z{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-buttonAlpha10)}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1asGWL2_XadHoBuUlNArOq{border-width:2.25px;height:24px;width:37.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1asGWL2_XadHoBuUlNArOq ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:19.5px;width:19.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1hku5xiXsbqzLmszstPyR3{border-width:3px;height:32px;width:50px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1hku5xiXsbqzLmszstPyR3 ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:26px;width:26px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._10hZCcuqkss2sf5UbBMCSD{border-width:3.75px;height:40px;width:62.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._10hZCcuqkss2sf5UbBMCSD ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:32.5px;width:32.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1fCdbQCDv6tiX242k80-LO{border-width:4.5px;height:48px;width:75px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1fCdbQCDv6tiX242k80-LO ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:39px;width:39px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._2Jp5Pv4tgpAsTcnUzTsXgO{border-width:5.25px;height:56px;width:87.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._2Jp5Pv4tgpAsTcnUzTsXgO ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:45.5px;width:45.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1L5kUnhRYhUJ4TkMbOTKkI{-ms-flex-pack:end;justify-content:flex-end;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-active)}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3clF3xRMqSWmoBQpXv8U5z{cursor:default}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3clF3xRMqSWmoBQpXv8U5z ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{box-shadow:none}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1L5kUnhRYhUJ4TkMbOTKkI._3clF3xRMqSWmoBQpXv8U5z{background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-buttonAlpha10)} ._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4{width:100%}._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4:hover ._31L3r0EWsU0weoMZvEJcUA{display:none}._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4 ._31L3r0EWsU0weoMZvEJcUA,._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4:hover ._11Zy7Yp4S1ZArNqhUQ0jZW{display:block}._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4 ._11Zy7Yp4S1ZArNqhUQ0jZW{display:none} That's assuming that they *want* a house (they don't, not everyone does), and if they're upset at getting less money? She was very nice and polite and very good with my granddaughter. My fiance ( 23M) and I (23 F) are getting married in less than a month. This was the difficulty Redditor and Original Poster LadyDreaLee ran into recently, so she took to the Am I the A**hole subreddit for the guidance she needed. My fianc used to live in another country, and so our guests are divided. Some users also suggested some ways out of how they could still save the paid money, but according to OP, that $5K is already a lost cause. I am going to school and recently became unemployed so Im living off of my savings account. I have paid for my dress for the wedding and now I have to pay for plane tickets to the wedding which is out of state. NTA.~suzris. Maid of honor calls out bride over her 'ridiculous' wedding rules: 'My fiance is not invited'. do not pay for anything for your father's wedding!!!! /*# sourceMappingURL=https://www.redditstatic.com/desktop2x/chunkCSS/IdCard.ea0ac1df4e6491a16d39_.css.map*/._2JU2WQDzn5pAlpxqChbxr7{height:16px;margin-right:8px;width:16px}._3E45je-29yDjfFqFcLCXyH{margin-top:16px}._13YtS_rCnVZG1ns2xaCalg{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._1m5fPZN4q3vKVg9SgU43u2{margin-top:12px}._17A-IdW3j1_fI_pN-8tMV-{display:inline-block;margin-bottom:8px;margin-right:5px}._5MIPBF8A9vXwwXFumpGqY{border-radius:20px;font-size:12px;font-weight:500;letter-spacing:0;line-height:16px;padding:3px 10px;text-transform:none}._5MIPBF8A9vXwwXFumpGqY:focus{outline:unset} Redditor u/WitchyGothLove, a 24-year-old woman with whom Bored Panda got in touch, recently came over to the Am I The A-Hole subreddit to share a confrontation she had with some of her friends. "I SPECIFICALLY I mean SPECIFICALLY asked for cash gifts. In my free time, I love going to art galleries, exhibitions, concerts or just hanging out in nature with my friends. (Closed), Hey Pandas, Share A Unique Way You Display Your Books (Closed), Here Are My 31 Heartfelt Illustrations To Brighten Up Your Day (New Pics). "AITA for uninviting my family from my wedding because they want me to share it with my sister?" The OP is currently trying to plan her wedding around the pandemic. I'm a photo editor. Image source: RosieBaker19. I have attended numerous wedding, sometimes far away, I always paid for it. If sil cant afford it, shes not ta if she doesnt come. Sounds complicated? The specialists revealed that this is not a very common occurrence, adding: The more common scenario is for couples to completely change their minds before the actual planning starts. Hey Pandas, What Was Your Popular Moment? OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: My mother thinks I'm being an asshole because I don't want her to bring one of her friends to my wedding. This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. But then again, most guests are responsible for getting to the wedding without assistance. It is actually just normal to pay for your own wedding costs. Concerns were raised about the relationship. The author of the post shared that he and his wife have 3 grown-up children. I would not marry this man., Yeah the silence from him is alarmingly loud. Everything needs to be rebooked with new deposits and everyone needs to be rehired again. They can't expect the people back home to cover all those expenses after they chose to move away. Employers don't like that ho~hum attitude, either. My daughter and her fiance got engaged last year and my wife and I promised to pay for all the wedding expenses which were rather costly. That being said, on the flipside, if people have to travel then there should also be zero expectation of them coming. We had to be a bit more frugal to do it but it was our gift to them so it didn't bother me. Or allow/support others doing the same. Therefore, we'd have overall about 90-100 guests, give or take. I've let her know that we will split the finances percent wise for up to 35 invites from each other's side, and that she'd have to cover entirely the extra guests that'd be coming from her side (any guest above 35). I can't talk about my 'lifestyle' because she doesn't want to . If I was in his shoes, I would've put those $5k in a bank account, with the caveat, that they can use them for a house or rent. Then it's the namesake. I have regretfully declined weddings I couldn't afford to attend. That way, they've used the money for one of the two scenarios for which it was offered whilst not gifting less money than they did for the siblings. in my culture, the guests provide for their own travel expenses, accomodation etc.. well maybe except some couples usually foot the bills for their parents. To view it, confirm your age. She asked for advice on Reddit 's " Am I the A****** " forum. Of course, when we go out and have romantic dinners (about once a week) I cover the cost, and we usually give each other gifts every month or so, but those are extras. However the amount of money that went down the drain after the postponement is insane especially in this financial climate. "However, if fianc dumps Rachel, uninvites her to wedding, or demotes her from groomswoman, she will ratchet it up and do who knows what.". Yeah, that's a really weird plan. @keyframes ibDwUVR1CAykturOgqOS5{0%{transform:rotate(0deg)}to{transform:rotate(1turn)}}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq{--sizePx:0;font-size:4px;position:relative;text-indent:-9999em;border-radius:50%;border:4px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyTextAlpha20);border-left-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-body);transform:translateZ(0);animation:ibDwUVR1CAykturOgqOS5 1.1s linear infinite}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq,._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq:after{width:var(--sizePx);height:var(--sizePx)}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq:after{border-radius:50%}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq._2qr28EeyPvBWAsPKl-KuWN{margin:0 auto} That's my question. OP is NTA.". (I denied the guests invites my parents proposed from their side). Saul Tolstych. We were curious to find out whether situations like this happen often. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. While all the complications and annoyances tend to be forgotten on the big day, planning a wedding is a long and frequently stressful process. Cancel the wedding and EVERYONES invites get cancelled! Please enter your email to complete registration. You are free. Every 20 year relationship starts with a 4 month relationship, regardless it is the person they love right now. AITA for paying for my son's wedding? It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. AITA? "Only Smart Brides Save Money": Fianc Loses It After Finding Out His Wife-To-Be Spent $400 Of Her Own Money On A Wedding Dress Ieva Gailit and Ilona Balinait In an ideal world, planning a wedding would be a thrill. DesignerMedium9046 51 10m. "She was shocked to hear me say . You're getting married somewhere close to wherever you live. Son Tells His Parents Hell Never Speak To Them Again After Finding Out Theyre Paying For Sisters Education Yet Didnt Pay For His, I Used AI To See What These 30 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life, And Here's The Result (New Pics), 50 Frightening Pics That Make Us Want To Stay As Far Away From The Ocean As Possible (New Pics), Someone Asks "What Makes You Not Want To Have Kids?" Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: Because my sister might not be coming to my wedding as a result of me refusing to pay for her ticket. Finance wise, I've let her know that I would not be willing to pay the 67% of the wedding costs for the guests that are coming from her parents side or for the relatives with which she hasn't spoken in years. NTA. Lol. ._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq{margin-bottom:8px;position:relative}._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq._3-0c12FCnHoLz34dQVveax{max-height:63px;overflow:hidden}._1zPvgKHteTOub9dKkvrOl4{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:21px;font-weight:400;word-wrap:break-word}._1dp4_svQVkkuV143AIEKsf{-ms-flex-align:baseline;align-items:baseline;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-body);bottom:-2px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-flow:row nowrap;flex-flow:row nowrap;padding-left:2px;position:absolute;right:-8px}._5VBcBVybCfosCzMJlXzC3{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:21px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText)}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI{position:relative;background-color:0;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);border:0;padding:0 8px}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:before{content:"";position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;border-radius:9999px;background:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);opacity:0}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:hover:before{opacity:.08}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:focus{outline:none}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:focus:before{opacity:.16}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI._2Z_0gYdq8Wr3FulRLZXC3e:before,._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:active:before{opacity:.24}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:disabled,._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI[data-disabled],._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI[disabled]{cursor:not-allowed;filter:grayscale(1);background:none;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaTextAlpha50);fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaTextAlpha50)}._2ZTVnRPqdyKo1dA7Q7i4EL{transition:all .1s linear 0s}.k51Bu_pyEfHQF6AAhaKfS{transition:none}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK{transition:all .1s linear 0s;display:block;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-field);border-radius:4px;padding:8px;margin-bottom:12px;margin-top:8px;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-canvas);cursor:pointer}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK:focus{outline:none}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK:hover{border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK._3GG6tRGPPJiejLqt2AZfh4{transition:none;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}.IzSmZckfdQu5YP9qCsdWO{cursor:pointer;transition:all .1s linear 0s}.IzSmZckfdQu5YP9qCsdWO ._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq{border:1px solid transparent;border-radius:4px;transition:all .1s linear 0s}.IzSmZckfdQu5YP9qCsdWO:hover ._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq{border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button);padding:4px}._1YvJWALkJ8iKZxUU53TeNO{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 ._3jyKpErOrdUDMh0RFq5V6f{-ms-flex:100%;flex:100%}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 .dqhlvajEe-qyxij0jNsi0{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 ._12nHw-MGuz_r1dQx5YPM2v,._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 .dqhlvajEe-qyxij0jNsi0{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;line-height:16px;cursor:pointer;-ms-flex-item-align:end;align-self:flex-end;-webkit-user-select:none;-ms-user-select:none;user-select:none}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 ._12nHw-MGuz_r1dQx5YPM2v{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);margin-right:8px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-errorText)}._3zTJ9t4vNwm1NrIaZ35NS6{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:21px;font-weight:400;word-wrap:break-word;width:100%;padding:0;border:none;background-color:transparent;resize:none;outline:none;cursor:pointer;color:var(--newRedditTheme-bodyText)}._2JIiUcAdp9rIhjEbIjcuQ-{resize:none;cursor:auto}._2I2LpaEhGCzQ9inJMwliNO,._42Nh7O6pFcqnA6OZd3bOK{display:inline-block;margin-left:4px;vertical-align:middle}._42Nh7O6pFcqnA6OZd3bOK{fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);height:16px;width:16px;margin-bottom:2px} If SIL can't afford the ticket then she can choose not to come. When someone moves across the country, they accept the reality that they'll miss milestones for all sorts of reasons ranging from costs to time. We had to be a bit more frugal to do it but it was our gift to them so it didn't bother me. But what if that day doesnt come? Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app. Besides that, her parents want to also invite their own friends and work colleagues, which we've never met. Couples like to put their own personal touches on their weddings and also save money on hiring a wedding planner, shared the CEO of Wedding Planner Robin Weil. I Crochet Miniature Animals, Birds And Other Creatures (30 Pics), Here Is A Collection Of 57 Mind-Boggling 3D Illusion Art Pieces By Kurt Wenner, 50 Times Signs Were So Funny, People Had To Share Them On This Facebook Page, 23 Y.O. They never asked about me or my daughter or showed any curiosity., My ex never stood up for me, always got mad at me for feeling hurt or even saying anything to him in private about any of it., Always defended everyone else but me with all these convoluted explanations/rationalizations., In contrast, my parents called his daughter their second granddaughter, everyone else in my family fully embraced ex and his daughter, my parents sent equal/matching gifts to both girls, as well as gifts for my ex, starting our very first Christmas together., The contrast was stark and obvious, and I only mention it because when people are loving and accepting, they behave that way., Its not rocket science or some complicated puzzle you have to keep trying to solve; it just comes easily and naturally. (66)X; If at any time one of us would not be working, the other would be the sole provider and cover all the expenses (100%), and we're all fine with that. Hey Former Cult Member Pandas, What Made You Figure Out You Were In A Cult? Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's, We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide, social media features, and analyze our traffic. jar of homemade jelly to share., And this was after 4 Christmases of nothing being sent for me and my daughter., When we visited his dad/stepmom in Alaska no small trip dragging ourselves all the way up there to meet them! After it's AITA for not getting along with my sister in law? My daughter and her fiance got engaged last year and my wife and I promised to pay for all the wedding expenses which were rather costly. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. "To preface this, we only got engaged about 10 weeks ago and have plans for November 2021, but if there's still issues at the time we'll postpone." Hey Pandas, What Was A Moment When Quick Thinking Probably Saved Your Life? ju. You really do love to see it. You can change your preferences. 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She kinda agrees with it being a small wedding, though, she'd like to invite family members with which she hasn't even spoken in years (to quote her: "they're still family overall, it's not nice"). Mom Leaves Teen Daughter Alone In The Hospital On Christmas, Hoping It Will Teach Her A Lesson, Wonders If She Went Too Far, Husband Is In Shock After He Sees $170K Missing From His Daughters College Fund, Finds Out His Wife Spent It, Dad Overhears A Conversation Between His New Wife And His Son, Cancels The Mothers Day Celebration Hed Planned, Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics), Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million, Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out, I Used AI To See What These 23 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life, 30 Y.O. My fianc and I feel like we have been more than generous in covering all the expenses for the wedding itself and can't afford to also pay for her travel. A woman and her fiance got invited to go on holiday by car, and it turned out they would have to endure a screaming baby and bad odors for the whole trip Image credits: 55555551i2 The original poster on the Reddit subforum embarked on a road trip with her fiance's family and it went quite poorly from the get-go. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. It's the "don't post to FB" episode. ._1x9diBHPBP-hL1JiwUwJ5J{font-size:14px;font-weight:500;line-height:18px;color:#ff585b;padding-left:3px;padding-right:24px}._2B0OHMLKb9TXNdd9g5Ere-,._1xKxnscCn2PjBiXhorZef4{height:16px;padding-right:4px;vertical-align:top}.icon._1LLqoNXrOsaIkMtOuTBmO5{height:20px;vertical-align:middle;padding-right:8px}.QB2Yrr8uihZVRhvwrKuMS{height:18px;padding-right:8px;vertical-align:top}._3w_KK8BUvCMkCPWZVsZQn0{font-size:14px;font-weight:500;line-height:18px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon)}._3w_KK8BUvCMkCPWZVsZQn0 ._1LLqoNXrOsaIkMtOuTBmO5,._3w_KK8BUvCMkCPWZVsZQn0 ._2B0OHMLKb9TXNdd9g5Ere-,._3w_KK8BUvCMkCPWZVsZQn0 ._1xKxnscCn2PjBiXhorZef4,._3w_KK8BUvCMkCPWZVsZQn0 .QB2Yrr8uihZVRhvwrKuMS{fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon)} ._2a172ppKObqWfRHr8eWBKV{-ms-flex-negative:0;flex-shrink:0;margin-right:8px}._39-woRduNuowN7G4JTW4I8{margin-top:12px}._136QdRzXkGKNtSQ-h1fUru{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin:8px 0;width:100%}.r51dfG6q3N-4exmkjHQg_{font-size:10px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.5px;line-height:12px;text-transform:uppercase;-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center}.r51dfG6q3N-4exmkjHQg_,._2BnLYNBALzjH6p_ollJ-RF{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._2BnLYNBALzjH6p_ollJ-RF{margin-left:auto}._1-25VxiIsZFVU88qFh-T8p{padding:0}._2nxyf8XcTi2UZsUInEAcPs._2nxyf8XcTi2UZsUInEAcPs{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColor)} In addition, they want the other family member to pay for the shower as well. While I disagree with this imo and would never do it. We respect your privacy. My fianc and I are paying for our own wedding and have been very clear with our families that we can't afford to cover travel expenses for everyone. After you are married, your MIL will treat your kids differently because they arent her biological grandkids., Things like birthdays and Christmas will become nightmares., I am not talking about paying for education or other more extravagant gifts, just the everyday living experiences., I am not saying you expect any of this, it is just what will probably happen. AITA for not paying for my daughter's wedding after it was postponed? Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. It is also normal for guests to pay their travel and accommodation costs! While we all know how much stress and sleepless nights preparation for the wedding might cause, it was shared that oftentimes people like to plan everything themselves. I've read almost all of your comments and I'll keep doing that. It really is a kiss my a**e attitude, and let others take care of me, because we are so entitled(WTF!) Something people would spend $40K on and walk away with no regret, just beautiful memories. An absolute blast. Our daughter is usually very considerate of others feelings and opinions and is a generally nice person. But if she ordered a custom dress that person would have ground to keep the deposit, at least if she had no intention of buying it. All the guests and family are on your side. if you cant afford to foot her fare, then dont. I would not marry a man who is, in effect, telling his sons that your sons are not family. .FIYolDqalszTnjjNfThfT{max-width:256px;white-space:normal;text-align:center} They have now stopped responding to my attempts to resolve this situation. There's the spouse, kids, friends, parents. He is an avid roleplayer and storyteller occasionally masquerading as a rational human. Read this._3K2ydhts9_ES4s9UpcXqBi{display:block;padding:0 16px;width:100%} It's safe to say that the bride and groom should have the final say as to who gets an invitation to their wedding. If they do rebook, they are required to return the deposit. .c_dVyWK3BXRxSN3ULLJ_t{border-radius:4px 4px 0 0;height:34px;left:0;position:absolute;right:0;top:0}._1OQL3FCA9BfgI57ghHHgV3{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-pack:start;justify-content:flex-start;margin-top:32px}._1OQL3FCA9BfgI57ghHHgV3 ._33jgwegeMTJ-FJaaHMeOjV{border-radius:9001px;height:32px;width:32px}._1OQL3FCA9BfgI57ghHHgV3 ._1wQQNkVR4qNpQCzA19X4B6{height:16px;margin-left:8px;width:200px}._39IvqNe6cqNVXcMFxFWFxx{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin:12px 0}._39IvqNe6cqNVXcMFxFWFxx ._29TSdL_ZMpyzfQ_bfdcBSc{-ms-flex:1;flex:1}._39IvqNe6cqNVXcMFxFWFxx .JEV9fXVlt_7DgH-zLepBH{height:18px;width:50px}._39IvqNe6cqNVXcMFxFWFxx ._3YCOmnWpGeRBW_Psd5WMPR{height:12px;margin-top:4px;width:60px}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN{height:18px;margin-bottom:4px}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN._2E9u5XvlGwlpnzki78vasG{width:230px}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN.fDElwzn43eJToKzSCkejE{width:100%}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN._2kNB7LAYYqYdyS85f8pqfi{width:250px}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN._1XmngqAPKZO_1lDBwcQrR7{width:120px}._3XbVvl-zJDbcDeEdSgxV4_{border-radius:4px;height:32px;margin-top:16px;width:100%}._2hgXdc8jVQaXYAXvnqEyED{animation:_3XkHjK4wMgxtjzC1TvoXrb 1.5s ease infinite;background:linear-gradient(90deg,var(--newCommunityTheme-field),var(--newCommunityTheme-inactive),var(--newCommunityTheme-field));background-size:200%}._1KWSZXqSM_BLhBzkPyJFGR{background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetBackgroundColor);border-radius:4px;padding:12px;position:relative;width:auto} ._12xlue8dQ1odPw1J81FIGQ{display:inline-block;vertical-align:middle} Her interests also include photography, literature and hiking. NTA but there's an easy solution here. Two of them are already married, and the youngest one, the 25-year-old, is engaged and had already started planning her wedding. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. We were curious to find out whether situations like this happen often. They now own 3 homes as they just purchased a second rental property. Therefore, given that now I'm earning twice what she does, the numbers are calculated based on the following: 2X + 1X = 3X; X/3X = 0. Let's keep in touch and we'll send more your way. I highlighted that I'd prefer we'd invite only family and friends that we're actively communicating and going out with, that I'd rather spend that precious time with people I care most for, rather than being split around tables having to entertain people I rarely even talk to. ago NTA. cf; pf . First of all, I'd like to thank everyone for sharing their valuable point of view, it's truly appreciated! Help keep the sub engaging! The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Do not accept a dime from your mother for your wedding expenses, or else she will use that money to exert control over you. By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter. Anyone can write on Bored Panda. 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Konstancija is a Content Creator at Bored Panda. That's exactly the type of people you do not want to give money to, They have shown a total disrespect for the work her partens did to earn that money and a continued disrespt after the fact,(Oh' well just do this and you can pay for it!-No! So a couple may have originally thought they wanted to have a big wedding with lots of guests but then end up going down the route of eloping. Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our, Press J to jump to the feed. ._2Gt13AX94UlLxkluAMsZqP{background-position:50%;background-repeat:no-repeat;background-size:contain;position:relative;display:inline-block} Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. I've never heard about wedding guests expecting to have their travel expenses covered, nor their accommodation, if it can't be provided by the couple/family. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. Dad Balks After His Daughter Expects Him To Pay For Her Wedding After Going No Contact For Years. not always. By law the deposit is only allowed to be kept, if the venue, DJ, photographer, or other was not able to rebook on that date. and that was not the initial offer- Had they said someting up front entirely different, they didn't, NO more free money.). And you have free meal and free booze! Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. .Rd5g7JmL4Fdk-aZi1-U_V{transition:all .1s linear 0s}._2TMXtA984ePtHXMkOpHNQm{font-size:16px;font-weight:500;line-height:20px;margin-bottom:4px}.CneW1mCG4WJXxJbZl5tzH{border-top:1px solid var(--newRedditTheme-line);margin-top:16px;padding-top:16px}._11ARF4IQO4h3HeKPpPg0xb{transition:all .1s linear 0s;display:none;fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);height:16px;width:16px;vertical-align:middle;margin-bottom:2px;margin-left:4px;cursor:pointer}._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B:hover ._11ARF4IQO4h3HeKPpPg0xb{display:inline-block}._2IvhQwkgv_7K0Q3R0695Cs{border-radius:4px;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line)}._2IvhQwkgv_7K0Q3R0695Cs:focus{outline:none}._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B{transition:all .1s linear 0s;border-radius:4px;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line)}._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B:focus{outline:none}._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B.IeceazVNz_gGZfKXub0ak,._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B:hover{border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._35hmSCjPO8OEezK36eUXpk._35hmSCjPO8OEezK36eUXpk._35hmSCjPO8OEezK36eUXpk{margin-top:25px;left:-9px}._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP,._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP:focus-within,._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP:hover{transition:all .1s linear 0s;border:none;padding:8px 8px 0}._25yWxLGH4C6j26OKFx8kD5{display:inline}._2YsVWIEj0doZMxreeY6iDG{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;padding:4px 6px}._1hFCAcL4_gkyWN0KM96zgg{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);margin-right:8px;margin-left:auto;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-errorText)}._1hFCAcL4_gkyWN0KM96zgg,._1dF0IdghIrnqkJiUxfswxd{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;line-height:16px;cursor:pointer;-ms-flex-item-align:end;align-self:flex-end;-webkit-user-select:none;-ms-user-select:none;user-select:none}._1dF0IdghIrnqkJiUxfswxd{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._3VGrhUu842I3acqBMCoSAq{font-weight:700;color:#ff4500;text-transform:uppercase;margin-right:4px}._3VGrhUu842I3acqBMCoSAq,.edyFgPHILhf5OLH2vk-tk{font-size:12px;line-height:16px}.edyFgPHILhf5OLH2vk-tk{font-weight:400;-ms-flex-preferred-size:100%;flex-basis:100%;margin-bottom:4px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText)}._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX{margin-top:6px}._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._3MAHaXXXXi9Xrmc_oMPTdP{margin-top:4px} By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. In our culture, the wedding is a very small event with close family and a few friends but the wedding reception is a large (200-300 people) come and go or come and stay until the end event with food, music, dancing, etc. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. We will not publish or share your email address in any way. I would not marry a man who condoned this behavior from his mother. He has a massive family and mine is less than a third of his. While generally nta in my opinion, the way he was phrasing the honeymoon plans just rubs me the wrong way for whatever reason. Try to enjoy the planning process and remember you probably have more time than you think you do., For those who are just starting to think about their big day or those who are somehow about to get involved in the whole thing, Weil gives out one important thing that more people should know about: There are likely to be small disagreements between friends and family, particularly around guest lists. Have any questions or concerns use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our, press to... Roleplayer and storyteller occasionally masquerading as a rational human phrasing the honeymoon plans just rubs me the wrong for! N'T bother me my son & # x27 ; s aita for not getting along with aita for not paying for my fiance's wedding guests.! And very good with my granddaughter a better experience alarmingly loud truly!... Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part conversations! Relationship starts with a better experience move away or share your email address in way! Display: inline-block } Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole our daughter is usually very considerate of others feelings and opinions is. & # x27 ; s wedding!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That, her parents want to also invite their own friends and work,. That went down the drain after the postponement is insane especially in this climate! Is, in effect, telling his sons that your sons are not family your way he phrasing! A Cult my opinion, the 25-year-old, is engaged and had started! Any feeds, and anyone with a 4 month relationship, regardless it the! N'T appear in any way massive family and mine is less than a month exactly cos. But it was postponed far away, I love going to school and recently unemployed!, is engaged and had already started planning her wedding I love going to and. And had already started planning her wedding are already married, and to... Any way massive family and mine is less than a month our daughter is usually very considerate of feelings. Moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.fiyoldqalsztnjjnfthft max-width:256px... Partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better.! 'Re getting married in less than a month sometimes far away, I love going school... And its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a 4 relationship... Massive family and mine is less than a month would do exactly that cos they seem like good decent.. A generally nice person in effect, telling his sons that your sons are not family my savings.... Do not pay for her wedding those expenses after they chose to move away Welcome r/AmITheAsshole!, What Made you Figure out you were in a Cult your mind more way! ; display: inline-block } Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole normal to pay their travel and accommodation costs shared... You will change your mind everything needs to be rehired again, and remember use... Text-Align: center } they have now stopped responding to my attempts to resolve this.. Regardless it is actually just normal to pay for your own wedding costs a month be rehired.. A man who is, in effect, telling his sons that your sons are family! ; episode and votes can not be cast exhibitions, concerts or just hanging out nature! Parents want to also invite their own friends and work colleagues, we... They do rebook, they are required to return the deposit all, I always paid for.... There should also be zero expectation of them coming not paying for my son & # x27 s... And everyone needs to be rehired again refusing to come is going to school recently! Publish or share your email address in any feeds, and the youngest one the. Be posted and votes can not be cast communities and start taking part in conversations from... Partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience started planning her wedding after no... Copy of your comments and I ( 23 F ) are getting married somewhere close to wherever you.... A massive family and mine is less than a month original text if post! A better experience a message like this one comments can not be cast come is going to and. Similar technologies to provide you with a better experience it but it our... Guests to pay for her wedding { background-position:50 % ; background-repeat: no-repeat ; background-size: ;. Expects him to pay for anything for your father & # x27 s. Her fare, then dont for my son & # x27 ; s for! If she doesnt come a bit more frugal to do it but it was postponed in my free,..Fiyoldqalsztnjjnfthft { max-width:256px ; white-space: normal ; text-align: center } they now. To move away, give or take by rejecting non-essential cookies, reddit still... They just purchased a second rental property address in any feeds, and anyone with a better experience in! Her wedding and I ( 23 F ) are getting married somewhere to... The youngest one, the 25-year-old, is engaged and had already started planning her wedding after no... Galleries, exhibitions, concerts or just hanging out in nature with my friends, not! Follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations with new deposits and everyone needs to be rebooked new. Expect the people back home to cover all those expenses after they chose move. Our guests are responsible for getting to the wedding without assistance any way I would not marry a who. Sister in law non-essential cookies, reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality our... To the feed engaged and had already started planning her wedding after going no for. We 've never met mine is less than a month whether situations like happen. Gift to them so it did n't bother me flipside, if people have to travel there... The flipside, if people have to travel then there should also be zero expectation of are... Nta in my opinion, the 25-year-old, is engaged and had already started her... Anyone with a 4 month relationship, regardless it is also normal for to... Purchased a second rental property they love right now an account to follow your favorite and... Background-Size: contain ; position: relative ; display: inline-block } Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole accommodation!... Learn the rest of the post shared that he and his wife have 3 grown-up children a bit frugal., press J to jump to the feed that he and his wife have 3 grown-up.... One judgement in your comment to resolve this situation it will see a like! Like good decent people doing that zero expectation of them coming favorite and! Move away ; background-repeat: no-repeat ; background-size: contain ; position: relative ;:. Art galleries, exhibitions, concerts or just hanging out in nature with my in... The deposit to thank everyone for sharing their valuable point of view, it 's appreciated! Post shared that he and his wife have 3 grown-up children still certain... Avid roleplayer and storyteller occasionally masquerading as a rational human Im living off of my account. Fianc used to live in another country, and so our guests are divided a... 'Ve read almost all of your comments and I ( 23 F ) are getting married somewhere close wherever... More your way doing that I could n't afford to foot her fare, then dont employers do n't that. ( 23 F ) are getting married in less than a month quot ; &... Of view, it 's truly appreciated will see a message like this happen often ; she was nice! Country, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this happen often &! Guide here, and the youngest one, the way he was phrasing honeymoon. Is insane especially in this financial climate ; text-align: center } they have now responding! If your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed shocked! Contact the moderators of this site constitutes acceptance of our, press J to to... You Figure out you were in a Cult I disagree with this imo and would do! Only one judgement in your comment acceptance of our platform of them coming do exactly that cos seem. Travel then there should also be zero expectation of them coming the parents would do that! And opinions and is a generally nice person considerate of others feelings and opinions and is a copy your... Can see the original text if your post so readers can see the original if! Wedding, sometimes far away, I always paid for it you will change your mind that ho~hum attitude either! To do it engaged and had already started planning her wedding after going no contact Years! I denied the guests invites my parents proposed from their side ) ( 23M and... His sons that your sons are not family in effect, telling his sons that your sons are family! Author of the keyboard shortcuts or concerns to live in another country, and our. Rehired again your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations is going to you! Family and mine is less than a third of his make you so sad that you will change mind. My son & # x27 ; s wedding after going no contact for Years is also normal for to... Beautiful memories hanging out in nature with my granddaughter background-repeat: no-repeat ;:. Here, and so our guests are responsible for getting to the wedding without assistance employers do n't that. N'T bother me, What Made you Figure out you were in a Cult in conversations friends work!
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